50 things I've learned in/from/around/because of my car

[jg09]

As the title says, 50 things I've learned in/from/around/because of my car (in no particular order):


1.) Always bring tools with you when you're doing any off-roading, even light duty stuff

2.) Watch for cops, especially when doing triple digit speeds

3.) Don't make out with girls who have a cold

4.) It's hard (if not impossible) to efficiently scratch your crotch in snow pants

5.) If there's any doubt as to how a race will turn out, you'll probably lose

6.) A collection of anything less than a dozen and a half CDs gets really boring, really soon

7.) Four is a crowd, five is awfully tight, six is two different vehicles

8.) Mud makes any vehicle look better

9.) Seatbelts save lives

10.) Passing on the right is dangerous, but can be very fruitful if done properly and safely

11.) 19 mm=3/4"

12.) Border patrol rarely pulls anyone over for traffic infractions, same goes for Tribal native cops

13.) Fog lights are really cool

14.) Always check how deep puddles are if they look any deeper than 6" or so

15.) Ice is really dirty

16.) Footprints on your windshield are hard to explain to parents

17.) Don't watch videos on cell phones/iPods/Zunes while driving

18.) Always blame your passengers for any mistakes you, as the driver, make

19.) Charge the people you give rides to for gas whenever possible

20.) Blast country music when you're feeling depressed, it'll lighten up your mood

21.) Always wear waterproof gloves in poor weather

22.) If the words "get off my property" and "gunpoint" are mentioned in the same sentence, leave immediately

23.) Quickly tapping the brakes to scare tailgaters is really only fun when you see the look they get on their face

24.) Nissan Pathfinders are surprisingly fast

25.) It's not the size of the tool, it's how you use it (no, I won't explain how I learned that, I'll leave you guessing on that one)

26.) Always do proper break-in after installing new brakes

27.) Huge spoilers on street cars are gay

28.) People who fear offending others have no fun in life

29.) Driving on medium-packed sand is comparable to driving on snow

30.) Intercoolers and blow-off valves make great stocking stuffers

31.) Outbacks attract less hot soccer moms than one first expects

32.) Walkie-talkies are man's greatest invention

33.) Lock the doors and window switches when fooling around in the backseat

34.) Eating a McFlurry while driving is rather difficult

35.) The suspension underneath Buick LeSabres isn't set up for "spirited" driving

36.) Having racing numbers makes you hardcore

37.) Always constantly check the tension of bike rack straps

38.) Having a panic button can be entertaining

39.) Getting a cigarette anywhere within 100 feet of the car seems to be enough to make the interior smell like smoke for the next three hours

40.) Having hot chicks as passengers leads to driving under the influence of stupid

41.) When in doubt, do a burnout

42.) Most "out-of-control" incidents can be dismissed as impromptu rally moments

43.) The seatbelts in the back seats of Legacy/Outbacks are perhaps the most complicated ever created for new users (they're pressed into the center, come on people, not that hard to figure out!!!!)

44.) True friends let you hide in their driveway when the cops are looking for your car

45.) Honesty is, indeed, the best policy

46.) Contrary to popular belief, everything in life can be made into a competition

47.) A good sticker scheme on a car's hatch can do wonders for its overall look

48.) The suggested speeds for most corners are only half of what they can be taken at

49.) On the contrary, nobody should ever do double the posted speed in a school zone

50.) If you don't like the way I drive, STAY OFF THE SIDEWALK!

[T_F_E]

Rofl, well done ;)

[JDMLegacy]

HAHAHAHAHAH^^^^^^ life lessons **nice**

[Grafton]

lol i've learned some of those too
especially #50 lol
i drove up the steps @ my highschool to pick up my wife (then gf) in the rain in a 86 nissan pickup

[97legacygt]

41.) When in doubt, do a burnout

That is kind of hard to do in most of our cars here. I would if I could.

[GTDrifter]

lol nice

[henryq89]

haha...dude thats soo awesome...great list lmfaoo

[impreza_GC8]

If I recall I mentioned number 16 in your scientific makout test thread.

[jg09]

lol i've learned some of those too
especially #50 lol
i drove up the steps @ my highschool to pick up my wife (then gf) in the rain in a 86 nissan pickup

So I'm not the only one that drives up high school stairs in my car? That's seriously how that one got on there. Car's kinda low though, scratches the rocker panels to hell when you don't have enough ground clearance.


But thanks guys, I kind of thought you guys would like it and connect to some of it. :lol:

[TheAngryPidgeon]

And now it's time for Deep Thoughts... with jg09.

lol

Well played man, I was loling on a good number of those.

[1996Battlewagon]

Nice list man! You've inspiried me to make my own list of 50 things that I have learned since I first was on the road. I just finished it, might post it up latter.

[jg09]

SWEET! I influenced someone! Can't wait to see it.

[97legacygt]

Speaking of your #16, I had a buddy who did two burnouts on the sidewalk right in front of the main entrance of the high school. He did them just far enough apart so it would like someone who had a locker did it. He was always getting blamed for all the black marks and obnoxious parking lot stunts. But there's a reason he was blamed. :roll:

[1996Battlewagon]

I hope this doesn't start a chain reaction that makes this one of the longest threads in SLi history, but I made a list as well. 50 things that I've learned since being on the road.

1.Do the work yourself; it’s more satisfying and cheaper to boot.
2.Carry tools around with you at all times; being Japanese doesn’t mean shit.
3.Make friends with the guys at your local auto parts shop; you’ll probably see them again.
4.Straight sixes are fast; but good luck with fuel mileage.
5.Flat fours make interesting noises; people either like it or they simply make fun of you.
6.If it’s black, old, and German, the girls will come.
7.If it’s tall, green, and powerful, the girls will come.
8.If it’s odd, white, and usually driven by lesbians, they simply leave you alone.
9.Aux lights are an addiction......... I think I need another battery.
10.The more grease you are covered with, the more of a man you are.
11.Solo drives in the mountains with a loving car can cleanse a car guy’s soul.
12.Off-roading can be satisfying; especially if nothing breaks.
13.Cars are often more pleasant to be around then people.
14.Always look where you’re going when performing a J-turn.
15.Never get your dream car as your first car; you’ll probably just wreak it.
16.Engine swaps ARE fun.
17.FWD, to put it in simple terms, sucks.
18.Spark plugs are actually not that hard to change on a Subaru.
19.REM is not a bad band; shut up.
20.Dropping from 5th to 3rd with a lot of power is funny on the passenger; especially when he or she isn’t expecting it.
21.Cops don’t like it when you speed.
22.RWD is fun; AWD will change you’re outlook on how cars behave.
23.Camrys are boring, but tough. I’ll give them that.
24.It doesn’t get much better than harnessing a good friend to your roof and doing AWD power slides in the rain. It helps if he is dressed like a cowboy.
25.Driving a stick is better. I’d rather wait to get a stick than buy an automatic and complain about it later.
26.Pulling the handbrake on a Jeep in gravel isn’t as dangerous as one might think.
27.Always keep your keys with you; you’ll never know when you might have to make a quick getaway.
28.No matter how much technology advances in automobiles, old cars are still more enjoyable to drive.
29.Always Seafoam your car in a crowded parking lot; it’s more funny that way.
30.Being the DD can be fun; drunken people are usually really stupid.
31.When the girl is just too darn pretty, just park the car.
32.Owning a wagon is both a blessing and a curse. “I’m moving this weekend and I was wondering……..”
33.Commuting on your bicycle can really make you appreciate your car.
34.Putting a new exhaust on in hopes of improving gas mileage only works after the first couple of weeks. For those first few weeks, you probably won’t be able to stop romping on the damn thing. (Read #5)
35.Another reason a stick shift is a good thing: ice breaker. “You can’t drive a stick? Oh, well I’ll teach you.”
36.Why the hell do I love this car so much? It’s just a damn Outback……..
37.Street races are only funny when you win…… or if the other guy tries to kill you.
38.Autocross, and autocross hard.
39.It’s ok to be a little car racist. The GM J-body was not a good car.
40.Unless you are a car guy, you’re not going to understand why I do the things I do.
41.Airbags hurt.
42.Suggested speed signs for corners usually mean drop a gear and go for it.
43.Drifting is only cool if you know what you are doing.
44.No matter how much coffee you just drank, you are not going to run faster than that car; so don’t try to race it.
45.School zones are just another way to make children’s lives more cushy and neglectful. Damn bureaucrats.
46.Pull your parking brake at least once, just to see what happens.
47.Driving is not a chore, it’s a pleasure.
48.You don’t necessarily have to lie to test drive that WRX.
49.When you find wrench’s in your pocket, you know you have a problem.
50.Station wagons are cool; don’t let anyone tell you other wise.

[JDMLegacy]

nice addition, i have a top 1 thing that i learned from my car the other day, I MEAN I KNOW THERES MORE but this one is really importnat

(any one local to fairmont READ CAREFULLY, this is for rt 19)

any thing faster than 55, is WAY TO FAST for a down hill S turn....... heh heh, i learned that a few times....but... i guess i keep forgetting, HAHAHAHAH-one day im gonna die

[anothernord]

11.Solo drives in the mountains with a loving car can cleanse a car guy’s soul.
This one speaks to me :cool:



20.Dropping from 5th to 3rd with a lot of power is funny on the passenger; especially when he or she isn’t expecting it.

ahahaaha!

[jg09]

14.Always look where you’re going when performing a J-turn...

23.Camrys are boring, but tough. I’ll give them that...

24.It doesn’t get much better than harnessing a good friend to your roof and doing AWD power slides in the rain. It helps if he is dressed like a cowboy...

26.Pulling the handbrake on a Jeep in gravel isn’t as dangerous as one might think...

:lol:
Wow, believe it or not, all of these are lessons I've learned, too, but since they weren't in the Outback, I didn't count them. Let's see, #14-learned in my Camry. #23-my camry has run without coolant and oil for a month and beat in the woods, still runs. #24-learned it in the Explorer last winter, but alas, no cowboy outfit. #26-learned it in my friend's XJ (ironically, same friend mentioned in #24).

Awesome list!

[slaytalera]

i vote this as the best thread ever :smt023

[marklj]

40.) Having hot chicks as passengers leads to driving under the influence of stupid

Guilty :cool:

[1-3-2-4]

I hope this doesn't start a chain reaction that makes this one of the longest threads in SLi history, but I made a list as well. 50 things that I've learned since being on the road.


10.The more grease you are covered with, the more of a man you are.

25.Driving a stick is better. I’d rather wait to get a stick than buy an automatic and complain about it later.

33.Commuting on your bicycle can really make you appreciate your car.


46.Pull your parking brake at least once, just to see what happens.



haha #10.. did that.. all the parking on the street was taken so I had to change the oil.. in front of the car was an water puddle with oil mixed in it.. I had on my winter jacket and was like oh what the hell.. I got down on my back and changed the oil.. the stain is still on my jacket to this day.

number #25 true.. I blew the front diff on my 03 XS and my bands got worn on my 95 Impreza L.. I said no more auto for me.

Number 33 very true.. however I'm not on a bike but I have been walking back and forth from the train station to work for about two years.. I want my damn Subaru!

Number #46 haha did that with my FWD impreza on a back road after I knew I had new tires coming from tire rack.

[anothernord]

40.) Having hot chicks as passengers leads to driving under the influence of stupid


Too true...

[Okin DaVanh]

1.Do the work yourself; it’s more satisfying and cheaper to boot.


28.No matter how much technology advances in automobiles, old cars are still more enjoyable to drive.

40.Unless you are a car guy, you’re not going to understand why I do the things I do.
41.Airbags hurt.

50.Station wagons are cool; don’t let anyone tell you other wise.

favorite 5 and new sig. :smt023 :grin:

[subba]

40.) Having hot chicks as passengers leads to driving under the influence of stupid

Guilty :cool:
Its stupider if your suspension is stiff and she has a big rack :(

[xXGTBspecXx]

i finally read this thread and found myself laughing because most of those apply to my as well. great lists guys..

[jg09]

40.) Having hot chicks as passengers leads to driving under the influence of stupid

Guilty :cool:
Its stupider if your suspension is stiff and she has a big rack :(

A big rack will stiffen my anti-sway bar any day... :shock:

[subba]

A big rack will stiffen my anti-sway bar any day... :shock:

WOW dude, this is the signature thread.

[grobo1082]

A big rack will stiffen my anti-sway bar any day... :shock:

WOW dude, this is the signature thread.


I second that

[anothernord]

Just figure for each hot chick in your car, your gas mileage will go down by 3-5 mpg from leadfooting, sooo if you're going on a longer drive take that into account. :grin:

[henryq89]

20.Dropping from 5th to 3rd with a lot of power is funny on the passenger; especially when he or she isn’t expecting it.


haha i love doing that...especialli at 75-80 mph :twisted: :smt026

scares the shit outta my girl friends haha....

i got a new siG ! yaY lol

[BenO]

Few things I have learned...

1. Seasonal roads in the winter time become Subaru fun time (Unless snow plow pile 5 feet high blocks entrance or exit on road :smt009 )

2. text message -be careful on the way over the roads are bad lots of snow
Me - Oh really :smt026 i guess getting sideways around turns and and taking the 10 minute longer back roads route is the safest way to go then.

[scenicrearview]

1. chicks like it when you "scare them" in your car

2. shopping carts weren't made for speeds past 35 mph

3. never ask yourself "why" always ask "why not"

4. slow drivers are not safe drivers

5. eveyrone who drives and Evo has spikey hair

lol a few of my observations

[jg09]

1. chicks like it when you "scare them" in your car

Oooo, but only if you're not equally scared at the same time. Chicks only like being scared when you're doing something that you're in control of (learned that one during my little lateral link-kinking incident).

[TheAngryPidgeon]

51. Sweet Tarts in excess of 90 in a single sitting will bite you back.

[T_F_E]

51. Sweet Tarts in excess of 90 in a single sitting will bite you back.
:sign5:

[xXGTBspecXx]

:smt117 51. is nice

[jg09]

51. Sweet Tarts in excess of 90 in a single sitting will bite you back.

LMAO! Yeah, that one is too true.

52. Landing jumps hurts worse that you'd expect

[hellaGT]

Well done sir!!! HAHA I think I'll gather some thoughts and try to put one together as well.

[subba]

i'll add another random fact, a big majority of people who drive the new mini coopers (outside the UK) are women or a skinny brown skin guy with mohawk or hedgehog type spiky hair..

[hellaGT]

So I forgot that I got to 20 a while back so here is what I came up with.... 10 from 1st car and 10 from the subie.

20 things I’ve learned from driving

1. A Bronco II is significantly more top heavy than I thought.
2. My brakes will feel “spongy” if the C-clip holding the axle into the rear differential breaks causing the axle to slide out separating the drum brake and eventually… “Turning me into a tripod, spinning me in a dimension of pissed-off I have never been before in my life…” -Ron White
3. Always carry ALL your tools since you will need the one you didn’t bring.
4. Starting to remove a bolt with a breaker bar is golden in most cases.
5. The German engine put in the ford bronco II was Germany’s revenge on America after WW2.
6. Never off-road without someone to pull you out.
7. Never off-road at night without a flashlight.
8. Never off-road without 4wheel drive.
9. Off-road is a verb.
10. The top of the battery is never a good spot to place a wrench on.
11. Always disconnect the battery when working on anything.
12. Revving the engine to drop the clutch is a poor idea in any car that can’t spin the tires and/or AWD.
13. Taking a turn at 60mph is dangerous and costly especially when you encounter wet pine needles…
14. A 99 subaru legacy 2.5GT engine compartment is significantly more logically laid out than an 89 ford bronco II.
15. A 2 liter water bottle with the bottom cut out makes the best funnel for most applications.
16. A clutch has a “friction zone”.
17. Anti-freeze can smell like maple syrup when coming out of an exhaust pipe.
18. I am not invincible on the road because I have AWD.
19. AWD only works when you are on the gas.
20. To effectively sound like a Subaru by using my mouth.

[1-3-2-4]

I learned that driving a MT and having the A/C on can be annoying a lot more then driving the auto.