Forgive me, father, for I have strayed.
Well, here it is. The first non-Subaru car I have owned in... well, several automotive iterations.
It is a 1993 Honda Civic Del Sol Si.
1.6l D16 Single-cam Vtec engine mated to a 5-speed manual transmission. The top does not leak, the windows all work, the tires are new, and it has no rot. It's not all sunshine and rainbows, however. There are a few issues to resolve, such as the fenders on both sides being dinged or smashed, depending on which side you're looking at, as well as needing a New turn signal housing. But overall, I think I have spent my $1500 well.